Is it Friday yet?

Bern’s gone till Friday (took college group to help lead a Bible camp out in the middle of nowhere, near the CA/NV border) so let these next couple posts serve as official documentation of our time as a trio.  Right now it’s pretty lame – we’ve passed around a stomach bug and have been sequestered from friends for five days now.  It started Thursday, when we were getting ready to visit David and his super-pregnant mommy Michelle.  I heard Kenzi upstairs yell out, “Ewwwww, Keves pooped on the floor!  I just stepped in some poopoo!”  I was both relieved and disheartened to find a little puddle of vomit on the carpet instead.  So we called and canceled our playdate and relaxed around the house.  In between the vomit and diarrhea diapers, that is.

Friday Kev was done throwing up but he went through diapers like a madman.  Bern got home from work after I’d regulated a “naptime” of four diaper changes and he popped Kev on the potty.   Wouldn’t you know, that dried him right up?  Until a half hour later when he was back in his diaper and felt free to soil himself.  Ugh.  Potty training is for yuppies anyway.

Bern would be taking the church bus to camp the next morning so we made a family trip out of gassing up the beast.  Kev wanted to tell stories the whole ride. “Shh, you have to be quiet.  I telling a story.  One time, Penn and Indie did not ride on the bus.”  “One time, Thomas was driving on the track.  He did not crash.  He just drove around.”  “One time, we were playing at church and Christopher squished a ladybug.” (That last one was true, and my kids can’t stop talking about it.  And they’re on the lookout for more sociopathic tendencies, Mr. Christopher.)

The next morning we got up early(ish) to drop Bern off at church and I felt horrible.  And not just because I’d miss my shnookie wookums.  I had the Kevey disease.  Not bad enough to throw up, thankfully, but pretty awful.  Since Kev had seemed better by bedtime we had planned to stick around that morning to see everyone off but I wasn’t feeling it.   So we trooped off to Walmart for Gatorade and just enough food supplies to see us through the weekend.  I got to be that awesome role model of a mom dragging her biscuit-eating kids around the store in their pajamas.  Then we came home and I spent the day on the couch, aside from diaper changes, meal prep for the kids (I mean that very loosely; we’re talking Kix with bananas for lunch and ramen with pretzels for dinner), and pulling apart my brawling children.  By 7 I was starving so I had a handful of pretzels and was rewarded with a big wave of nausea.  So I pretty much tossed Kev in bed after an impressively fast diaper change, ignoring his cries that he was going to get cavities because I didn’t brush his teeth.  I told Kenzi to get herself ready for bed and go lay down, and she assured me she had it covered.  Then I hopped in bed and watched tv for an hour before zonking out.

I woke up feeling a million times better, until I tried eating breakfast.  Bad choice.  Definitely skipping church.  And skipping lunch, while we’re at it.  We spent another day at home and I did a really poor job of entertaining the kids.  By 4pm we were dying to get out so we went to church to look for a coupon I’d printed off for Kids Party Central, the big inflatable playplace we were planning to visit Monday morning.  I’d invited some friends to join us and use our coupon.  Usually the kids run around all crazy in the fellowship hall outside Bern’s office but Kenzi just went in his office and curled up on the chair, saying, “My legs are just so tired of running.” Yeah, that’s a bad sign.  By the time we left, she was clutching her stomach and saying that it hurt.  She didn’t want any dinner and spent the rest of the evening moaning on the couch.  I emailed everyone that we weren’t doing Party Central and put the kids to bed.  I thought I’d give this eating thing another try and heated up some chicken broth – let the nausea and early bedtime commence.

This morning, Kenzi woke up saying she was feeling great and she was able to have a good breakfast with no problem.  I was glad to see she wasn’t sick but bummed that we’d canceled our playdate because I had looked forward to three hours of the kids bouncing themselves into exhaustion.  We made a Target run and cleaned the garage and just putzed around the house.  Right now we’re watching Jungle Book for the first time, and Kenzi keeps asking, “Is that a nice kitty or a mean kitty?  Is that a nice wolf or a mean wolf?  Is that snake nice?”  And we haven’t even met Shere Khan yet.  She is going to be seriously freaked out.

So the first half of the post wasn’t really for Bern’s sake since he was around for it, and the second half is really just a sad plea for pity.  And definitely no pics since I’m ashamed of the state of my house.  But we’re really doing ok, and tomorrow we have a playdate that I’m not canceling unless there is actual vomit pouring forth because we’re all in serious need of socialization.  It’s humbling to realize that I’m not going to get a bunch of cleaning and organizing done like I’d thought, but resting’s not too bad either.  I’ll update again soon, hopefully with tales of all the fun we’ve had and the people we’ve seen.