Some Kevey-isms

Kev likes to help at the grocery store by putting food on the belt at checkout. Once, while putting a box of crackers on, he said to the cashier, “Here you go, Worker.”  Sounded like such a snob.  He sorta made up for it by then turning to the bagger and asking, “How are you doing today?”

While getting buckled into his carseat, Kevey was telling me a story.  I interrupted to ask him to put his book down so I could get his arm through the strap.  He grabbed his ears and said, “It is MY turn to talk and YOUR turn to listen.”

We think he has a future working for a radio station.  If we’re listening to a cd he’s familiar with (OneRepublic’s latest is his current obsession), he makes sure to yell out the name of each song once it begins.  “Mommy!  It’s ‘Secrets’! ‘Secrets’ is on!!  ‘Secrets’ is on right now, Mommy!”  And with each song he asks the same questions every single time. “Why does he say he has no family he can blame?”  “Why does he say that about truth?”  “Is he playing the cello right now?”  The rest of the time he strums his cardboard (or invisible, in the case of the car) guitar and sings along.

I think the Kevey-ism that we hate the most is “Actually…” (which he pronounces ash-she-lee).  He will find a way to correct everything we say, starting or ending with that dreaded word.  Bern and I just can’t seem to stop being idiots, so we’re thankful that Kevey can tell us how things really are.  Here’s an example of how this works (with 4 options as Kevey’s response):

“C’mere and get your shoes, little guy.”

“No, I’m BIG actually!” or “Actually these are boooooots!” or “I have to get socks first actually!’ or “Actually I want Daddy to do my shoes!” As you can see, my request was moronic on so many levels, and poor Kevey has to settle on only one aspect to rebuke me about.  It’s stressful for me to be so dumb all the time, but it must be even more stressful to be 3 and already decades smarter than your parents.

And the grand finale.  We were chatting about how it will be nice to visit the Carbos in LA.  Kenzi said, “When I go to Los Angeles, I will tell Penn that December is Diciembre in Spanish.”  Kevey said, “When I go to Miss Angeles, I will give Buster [their super-silly dog] a hug.  And then I will kiss him on the…….buttcrack!”